Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Dompig in Hospital: "Legally Insane"


Gerold Dompig is recovering in the hospital from a self inflicted bonfire. Doctors treating the Chief believe he is "legally insane."

Dompig apparently is blaming a Vanity Fair writer for pinning him down and holding a magnifying glass over him and setting him on fire. "Looked like the seared tuna I had for dinner last night" said Jan van der straaten II, the attending physician.

Aruba still distracting, only this time it's not the security guards but Natalee and Beth who have become the wrongfully accused. Highly paid PR men are now devising a spin that doesn't include how the guards were held for 7 days after their story of innocence was verified. John Pauly commenting on Chief Dompig, "Gerry was under stress, he needed to blow off steam and was under pressure from Paulus van der sloot to lay the groundwork for the truth to come out. By blaming Natalee it may be more acceptable when the world finds out why there was no investigation at all." "Most importantly the VF writer found no evidence of corruption."

Doctors at Barcelona Hospital in Aruba confirm that Dompig is bleeding blame."We've been unable to stop the blaming and have fears he may hemorrage, " said Pono Croes, the attending physician. "He's quite toxic."

Jan van der straaten, the former Police Chief, was seen riding a white horse around the hospital last night.

Now that you're toast Chief, who's putting the butter on your burns? Do you know which side it's being applied?

Joe Mammana is orgainizing a return trip for the MB Students to visit Dompig while he's recovering. Although Dompig is wrapped in gauze from head to toe, you can still see his eyes.