Friday, March 17, 2006

Aruba Searchers Find Remains of 3 People in Dunes

Bon Dia, Friday March 17th

Aruba: Searchers in Aruba have found the remains of at least 3 bodies in the dunes. Gerold Dompig was quoted as saying, " We can confirm 2 of the remains as belonging to Mickey John and Abraham Jones."

When asked how he knew who they were so quickly, Dompig responded by saying "because I just do."

The Chief was adamant, "we did not find sneakers of any kind." When asked how close the remains were found to one another the chief said, "did I mention that we did not find any sneakers at all?"

Chief Dompig, clearly elated at the news praised his department. "All of the police in Aruba should be very proud of their hard work. This is a partnership with an american company that doesn't support the boycott and a clear example of how Beth Twitty has been holding up this investigation."

Sources believe the remains of the 3rd person are that of Natalee Holloway, but are waiting for the Forensic Institute in Holland to confirm it.

When asked why it takes longer to confirm those remains when they were able to identify the guards so quickly, Dompig said, "did I mention that no sneakers were found?"

"No seriously, Joran van der sloot and his father personally identified the remains of the security guards."

Joran Van der sloot praised the mother of Mickey John, "now that's how the family of a missing person should act." He went on to say what he saw of the unidentified remains, "I looked like the person hit their head."